Tuesday, July 11, 2006

I hate today

I am in the world's pissiest mood today. My day started out way too early -- 6a.m. My darling son has decided to boycott sleep. Gary came home from work for breakfast and he just annoys me. Can't he manage to load his freaking cereal bowl?! He could if he wanted to, but I don't think he cares to. Then he crashed on the couch for a few hours -- which I understand he was tired. But when he was waking up I told him I'd ordered a few things for myself offline. All totalling under $20. Now mind you, I didn't have a reward for losing 50lbs like I had planned. This was my treat to myself. He sort of got huffy, then later denied it. Never freaking mind that he gets new games all the time. In the past month over $100 worth. I could go on and on about why I'm angry at him... suffice to say I just am.

Then my dishwasher -- my brand new dishwasher -- was leaking. This is a dishwasher I had to fight the stupid housing department to get for over two years. I live in the slums, I swear. It's a shame what the military houses their soldiers in sometimes. Now I know when the guy comes to fix it, he'll blame it somehow on us. That's always how it is.

My cable is out. Well it's not totally out. The lower channels don't show what's on. I pay for digital cable dammit. I have grown accustomed to seeing what's on and what it is about. I PAY FOR THAT!! But that part is out. Has been since Saturday. They don't have an estimated time of repair. Oh and to get a credit, I have to call and ask for one. They can't just automatically issue it?! This cable company SUCKS. Gary had better cable when he was in freaking South Korea!

I also want food. Real food. Meat. I also want that doctor at the ER fired. That won't happen -- either one of them. I want something to do -- but no car. And hell even if I had a car, I would have nowhere to go because I'm stuck in this town called HELL!

Which is another thing. Gary hasn't been working on his warrant officer's packet like he promised. He PROMISED to get it ready to send off so he could hopefully (most likely) be selected to go to the January class. But nooooo his fucking video games are so much more important. So now I'm stuck here for another YEAR!! ANOTHER YEAR. If you've never been here, you couldn't possibly understand why I'm so upset. I know my friend Susan is here, but she's managed to find some good here. I just can't seem to.

Right now I'm just pissy, angry, sad and mad and I hate it because I don't know how to get out of this funk. I'm glad Gary has duty today. He'll be gone a lot and at least I won't be mean to him like I want to be.

Oh yeah and it's been forever since Gary's done anything nice for me -- a trinket, a small gift, anything.


Deana said...

I am sorry its one of those days, I hope things get better!

Nobody special said...

I am sorry you are having a bad day and even sorrier about your f-ing doctor!
When I was pregnant with A, my ex came in the exam room with me, and the dr told me to lift up my shirt and then slowly tweaked both my nipples and laughed and said, "I had to make sure they werent inverted". Not near as bad as you, but I still remember it and how crappy it made me feel.
But you know what? Be PROUD of yourself for filing a complaint! At least then you called him on it, and if nothing else, maybe he will think twice before doing it to someone else now.
Things will be better soon. For someone that can't eat much, you sure have a lot on your plate lately! :(

Susan Davis said...

I'd hate to be stuck with no car. Any way you can drop him off at work next time so you can have the car?

Set time to work alongside Gary with his packet. Ask him when he gets off work when would be a good time for the two of you to sit down and focus on getting the ball rolling.

If I can do anything to help perk you up, holler at me.

I'm lazy today and should be packing to go home to Florida, but instead, I'm sitting on my butt doing the same stuff I did yesterday.