Friday, June 09, 2006

The Strangest Relationship I have

I've been thinking a lot about food. Hmmm go figure. At first it was almost obsessive. Now it's more just a constant thought. I often think of what I'd want to eat. Or what would taste good combined. I have even cooked once for Gary and Gunner. I have made Gary lunch three times. Basically I'm not avoiding food at all. I'm trying to be around it. I have to build a healthy relationship with food. I inhale the smells to the point I think I can taste it. I've now started envisioning how I'll eat. I envision the small, small portions. How I'll chew thoroughly. I have to rethink how I treat food. How I eat. The frequency, everything. It's a whole new ball game. I refuse to ignore food. Or ignore that I love it and everything about it. I think this is the best way -- face it head on. It'll always be a struggle. This time, though, I'm going to eat to live, not live to eat.

5 comments:

Mimi said...

Do you go to the support groups they have? I've heard that helps, but it sounds like you have a handle on it already. Keep up the good work.

On The Losing Side said...

Mimi ~ I am going to go to a support group. There isn't one in my area right now. The closest one is an hour away. But that's not really a problem. I'm going to go to the one my doctor has once a month, though it's a 2 hour drive each way. I figure I can do the four hour drive once a month for the sake of support. Thanks for your thoughts!

Mimi said...

I'm glad, if you ever need to vent, just drop me an e mail, I haven't had the surgery, but I would love to hear how things go and maybe I'll finally take that step.

hyka's mess said...

I'm so proud of your outlook!!!

Susan Davis said...

Do you live by the golf course? Either way, it's a great track to walk on... long and hilly, but beautiful and refreshing. It's 1-2 miles, I think. Perhaps you could do a portion of it at first.

I'm so glad you're exercising and are full of motivation! God's good, ain't He?!